Now, for many folks, typically associated with religious and conservative value systems, abstinence relates to a lifestyle choice, either for a lifetime, or up until the point of marriage. Abstinence related to a long-term lifestyle choice, such as that embraced by Catholic priests and nuns and Buddhist monks is typically termed "celibacy". Abstinence related to remaining "pure" before marriage and maintaining the sexual relationship with the "sacrament of marriage", is usually termed "chastity".
However, sexual abstinence can be more broadly interpreted. For instance, some individuals engage in periodic abstinence, due to the onset of disease or due to lack of opportunity. If your partner has a herpes outbreak, you and your partner may choose to be abstinent until the outbreak is cleared up. For some individuals who are undergoing treatment for cancer, the side effects of the treatment may result in abstinent behavior. Sometimes, individuals lack a partner and may experience involuntary abstinence until another partner enters their life. In Judaism and Islam, abstinence is indicated during the female menstrual cycle. Some individuals include masturbation in their definition of abstinence, others believe that someone can be abstinent but still can masturbate.
In the context of this blog, we are referring to sexual abstinence, which may be periodic or long-term and which includes refraining from a vast array of sexual behaviors. Regardless of your feelings about sexual abstinence, there are two benefits that are constant, with perfect use: 1) No risk of infection through sexually transmitted infections (STI) and 2) No risk of pregnancy.
You may ask, what does "perfect use" mean? Perfect use means no sexual intercourse with another person or animal. You may also wonder, what does "sexual intercourse" mean? Sexual intercourse includes a variety of behaviors, such as insertion of penis into the vagina (vaginal intercourse), insertion of penis into the anus (anal intercourse), oral sex including fellatio (blow jobs), cunnilingus (going down on a woman), and rimming (licking the anus), genital rubbing with or without penetration, mutual masturbation, sharing sex toys and so forth. Additionally, when discussing sexual intercourse, we are including male-female, male-male, female-female and human-animal interactions. Now this is by no means a comprehensive list. You may be surprised at the array of behaviors people engage in without understanding they are violating the precepts for "perfect use" in abstinence.
Sadly, many abstinence-only programs focus more on the risk of an unwanted pregnancy than on the possibility of disease and the variety of behaviors that should be discussed. Many focus only on male-to-female sexual behaviors, typically related to vaginal intercourse, thus limiting the definitions of what is and what isn't considered risky behavior. When the issue of disease is taught, often it is linked directly to death. While fear and guilt are tactics used by insurance salesmen, it is not an especially useful technique when attempting to change teen or young adult behavior.
Research to-date has overwhelmingly demonstrated that abstinence-only educational programs are not any more effective than no program in reducing sexual intercourse, or reducing risky sexual behavior in teens. In fact, the research on abstinence-only programs is "limited and discouraging" (Collins, Alagiri, Summers & Morin, 2002) . However, abstinence-plus and comprehensive sexual education programs are supported by peer-reviewed journal data which strongly indicates that these types of programs do result in behavior change with young people including "delaying sex and ... using contraception more consistently and carefully" (Kirby, 2007) .
Delaying sex is a form of abstinence which can have positive results including (as stated above): Two benefits that are constant, with perfect use: 1) No risk of infection through sexually transmitted infections (STI) and 2) No risk of pregnancy. Are you seeing a theme here?
The moral of this question of abstinence is that abstinence in and of itself is a complex topic. Choosing abstinence is a viable choice, but it is important to determine what your goals are in making that choice. It is also important not to impose fear and guilt on yourself if, after choosing to be abstinent you inadvertently abstain from abstinence, either by choice or by accident. (Say that 5 times fast!)
